Are you a Drill Sargent? Task Master? or maybe a Control Freak?
Are your old tired stories getting boring? maybe not giving you the same hit that they previously provided?
We tell ourselves all the time that we should “let it go.” We feel the cost of holding on so tightly. We know that it’s a good idea to let go of stories from the past that are dragging us down, but how do you do it? I’ll share six words with you… “Pay attention to your aliveness meter”
When you are in these characters, do you feel a drain of energy when you’re doing it? or does your aliveness meter get fed? Do you understand energy can cost your health, your presence, your happiness! Don’t give it away! Find out what feeds you cause this is the stuff I’m talking about!!! The juicy stuff!!! The times that life just seems too good, yes, I want to live there and not just part of the time, all of the time!
We cannot make people do things, we cannot get lost in a bunch of tasks nor are we able to try and control. The key word being “try”, as most things on the planet are outside of our control. In fact, about the only thing that is in your control is how you decide to respond to life. Everything else…whether people will like you, how people will feel when you tell them something, what other people think, whether someone keeps their agreements with you…ALL are outside of your control.
Devote yourself to your aliveness, stand up for it, listen for its voice. Notice when your aliveness is up and flowing and notice when it’s dropping. It is your true guide. Are you willing to let it go and choose your full on aliveness?
I wrote this article about a year ago today on Visions of Success Facebook; however today felt I myself needed a reminder. Awareness of what “your results are” is a big clue to what your committed to creating. Today, I will commit and appreciate in Visions of Success’ Facebook group “Life Changing Play”, I invite you to come join our creative “play”ground.
Innovation, Ideas and creative thinking come most when the mind is open and curious. So when are we fully open and curious? In my experience it’s from cultivating the proper environment for growth. Let me give you an example, when I am about to plant tomatoes I make sure my soil is nutrient rich with tomato fertilizer on hand, proper structural support and placed in the right spot for optimum sun! These babies are poised for ultimate growth and yummy goodness!!! How do we do this for ourselves that the light simply shines on us and we have ultimate growth? How do we receive innovation, inspiration and ideas freely? How do we become aligned with our being and our purpose?
Here are 3 critical steps;
Step 1 – Take yourself out of the familiar box! You know that box you “go to” or “do” everyday. You know the one that almost feels as if you’ve fallen asleep on yourself and you are able to do it at times with your eyes closed. Yeah, this box! You may actually feel a drain of energy almost immediately when recognizing and acknowledging this box.
Step 2 – Next, Stand in the Unknown allowing random thoughts to enter. When I say “thoughts” it doesn’t mean that these thoughts necessarily will be true. Well, it could be true to you, but have you verified this story lately? Trust me, thoughts will enter the mind, it could be as simple as, “Okay, I’m bored already and there’s so many things I could be doing vs. standing here waiting for this random epiphany this exercise is telling me I’m going to experience!” Let’s start here. Is that true? Am I bored? What did the mind say? Now, ask your body as silly as it may sound, start by closing your eyes and doing a full body-check. Breathe in & out bringing the breathe all the way to the top of your brain, circling the entire head, then moving thru the neck & shoulders; maybe add some sound on the out-breath? There’s no cheating; do this until you’ve hit every nook of your body’s beautiful cellular DNA BODY! Now, wait… Ask yourself again AFTER the full body check – you still bored? Are you committed to being bored?
Step 3 – If you’ve made it past step 2, Congratulations! You’re on your way out of the box and in to more creative space! So, how many feet are out of the box? Is there any part of your body physically left in this box? What do you see? Have your legs re-planted on the earth? What’s the ground look like? Where are your feet? Do you have shoes on? Are you on a paved surface? Fresh Dirt or maybe warm sand? Let’s begin to dig our toes into this new surface we’ve created unless where wearing shoes, then we may need to take them off? Now, slowly begin to stretch your arms towards the clouds using sound when possible (and if there are no clouds in your personal image, just reach up) and stretch FULLY into your vision. Are you breathing?
From this new space with improved “elbow room” we’ve cultivated a greater open & curious platform for creative thinking. Are you still feeling crowded, overwhelmed and maybe even suffocating? Then start again on #1, maybe it takes a few tries or maybe a full on emotional breakdown. There is no right or wrong outcome in this exercise. We are all at different places in our lives with varying responsibilities, but if you’re thus far in your research, I can already testify to your inquisition to create a new way of being.
Now, I want to add that if your box is presently a bunch of creative thinkers, full of aliveness and connection, then by no means am I discouraging this co-creation and collaboration; but maybe the thought is to encourage a bigger box? We all fall in a “box” of some sort at times, even if just “limited thinking” including myself. I have been practicing for over a decade, challenging my belief systems and validating if they serve me today. I use full body check-in’s, persona play (which I didn’t touch much on today) and many other resources, tools and villages.
Would you be interested in more exploration? or help locating this beautiful, roomy, comfortable and juicy space of non-stop fuel that feeds aliveness making life’s journey a ride that tickets are free? The very best investment you can make is yourself whether with Visions of Success or a good book. I invite you to find your magic and share it with the world. Stay awake my friends.
Stage One – Readiness
Have you ever said, “If only my partner could see/hear”? …or “I just want it to be like they used to” or maybe “How come he/she doesn’t do or act like when we met?”, Do they still love me? This is a difficult path to navigate communication in a relationship. The two simple words “IF ONLY” has us looking for answers outside ourselves, forever trying to change how others behave in order to feel better about our own lives.
if only this person acted a certain way, or if only they would (you fill in the blank) make more money? get some cooperation around the house?
Even if we got everything we wanted, there would be something else to eat away at our contentment, because the if onlys are only symptoms of the real problem
By the time couples come to therapy , sometimes it is beyond repair.
What do you Really believe about love? When you operate from these limited beliefs, you wind up with limited options.
The tricky part is most of us don’t realize when we’re not loving ourselves! The work we do on ourselves offers new lenses of how you’re showing up in your life and with others both conscious and unconsciously. Are you open and curious to creating or finding the Love of your Life and a Life that you Love? I invite you to work on your VISION and understand your Requirements, Needs and Wants; including relationship agreements / plans.
Why use a relationship coach
What you believe, you can achieve!
If you can’t be in a great relationship, why be in one?
Spend it ANY way you want, YOUR Choice – REALLY IT IS !!!
Claim YOUR time, it’s YOURS!!! Guilt FREE!!!
How does attachment take my time? What is attachment? Attachment to Money? Attachment to Spouse? Attachment to all those things I say I Need to do! There are many things we attach ourselves to unconsciously, which does not always allow us to manifest what we desire & want most. What if I asked you to create from a place of ENOUGH. Enough Time, Enough Money, Enough Food, Enough Love (I could go on here), but simply start at “Creating from Enough” without allowing your attention to wander to the past or the future.
So, coming from a place of “I have no time” what are you talking about? I have to get up early get the kids out the door, or maybe it’s “I need to drop my spouse of at work because we only have one car right now?!” or maybe the excuse is well “If I stop doing and start being then I’ll be bored” or maybe there’s a story of “I’ll be alone” or worse maybe “I’ll be alone with nothing to do” not much curiosity or presence in those statements, just a bunch of fear based induced conclusions!
Starting from ENOUGH consciously brings experience in the present. Check in right now and bring awareness to what YOUR doing in this moment, Are you being fed or drained? When you begin to experience claiming YOUR time, standing right here in the “NOW” having nothing to do with the circumstances around you; and not allowing thought to take you out of your experience it’s a completely different experience and often brings gifts and surprises!
I can attest that I feel more on track when claiming my time, it’s MINE!!! I can share that some of my other obligations that actually bring me more revenue, but coming from a place of ENOUGH I don’t NEED revenue, I have everything I need. It’s a very special commitment to self. I can choose to create more not because I need to, but because I want to.
Pay close attention, listen deeply and notice how excited and fueled with everything you do from that place of enough-ness! Know that you are being fueled by trust rather than fear and now spreading a contagious level of inspiration to all those around you to want the same.
We no longer need excuses to not go out with a friend, call in sick, not clean the house. We don’t need another story to enjoy the time we want to see what experience can happen from that place of “I have enough Time” That everything is and will be alright if I take care of myself first. Even in the airplane, you put the oxygen mask on 1st before placing on your child, but what if you never needed the oxygen system? — Are you ready to commit to having enough time? Take it even a step further… Are you willing to Having enough of everything and witness the difference of the experience coming from this place? “Everything you want is on the other side of fear” — Rumi
Business, Life and Relationship Coach
We manifest our visions long before we create them!
Seamlessly integrating Starting at Enough
During the winter season we often can find ourselves in a funk, feeling hopeless, worthless or irritable. We often lose interest in social activities. Winter Blues are a known as a time for hibernation where becoming withdrawn feels more natural as we fight low energy, oversleep and put on weight. You may find yourself craving carbohydrates,” such as chips, cereal, crackers, and cookies. All clues it’s time to Relax, Read, Exercise or contact a Good Friend. These symptoms generally last until the days start getting longer.
“Spring, summer, and fall fill us with hope; winter alone reminds us of the human condition.”
Permission to bask in the knowing that Winter is a time of Wisdom; Wisdom has been regarded as one of four cardinal virtues promoting collective and individual greatness!
Much Warmth and Love,
Hmm… “The Importance of Unwinding”
I almost want to say “enough said” looking at this picture of a happy little girl and her top – right? We have the talent to wind this top up really good and then let her fly!!! What I remember as a kid was that it was a bit more difficult to wind it up, and sometimes when over-wound, it broke. I also remember when you wound it just the right amount, it was a whole lot’a fun to let it go!!! Similar to my first memory of a slide! So, I ask when did it become so hard to let it go? … as humans we can gravitate to the same old patterns and I’m no exception to this madness.
I practice awareness on a daily level and can easily go unconscious and allow my “masks” to take over. My personal favorite mask is the one that says “everything is okay” or “I got this” where I place everyone’s needs ahead of my own without blinking an eye. Honestly, in the wind-up phase I’m no longer really setting anchorage to my body at this point, it’s an immediate brain response and I’m glad my mask is blocking my view so I don’t have to feel. During the “winding phase” I believe there is no significance of my body sensations cause I am no longer listening to my body. I call it emotional stacking. It’s a shelf over in the corner of the room behind the door so no one can see it, not even me.
I recently gifted myself a 3-day “unwinding phase” and this is where I could really tap into how extremely tight my neck had become and especially between those shoulder blades. I could also recognize a deep soreness in my jaw that revealed it’s contribution to my headaches. The 1st day I slept, created a story it was the flu, not fully believing it. I did have a lot of congestion and absolutely no energy, so maybe it could be… but by day 2 I was feeling better noticing a fierce resentment to work and anyone that wanted anything from me. BY day 3 I could clearly see the cost of my over-winding. I no longer condemned my work or wanted to shun people from my life. I felt movement in my shoulders and a need to stretch deeply and re-connect with my body. I had breathe, long luscious deep nourishing breath.
Thank goodness that WE have the Power to re-program and change these old, worn-out patterns. I am creating new belief systems shifting dilapidated patterns. WE have a choice to turn on daily awareness and create sustainable, healthier, happier, momentous beings living in our vital experience. Think about the word “vital” root of VITALITY!
“Letting it go” can be as simple as “unwinding” and letting your top fly and capturing some play time! Much Love — Gina
I ran across a quote today that provided me an overwhelming sense of safety that my value is not measured by the size of my home or my check book. I am enough! My Inner Safety is mine and the outer world can rattle me or provide an edge to grow; but my inner knowing knows this story holds no water today! I am enough!
“‘Enough money’ isn’t a quantity. ‘Enough’ isn’t out there; it’s a relationship to what you already have. Unless you work on that, first (or simultaneously with how you’re making money) you will never feel like you have enough, and you will always feel poor. It’s possible to feel fat when you’re thin, and to feel poor when you’re rich. And the thing that changes is your relationship with ‘enough.’” ~ Geneen Roth
For the next 6 months I commit to my personal relationship to Money and it’s underlying stories and fears. Relationship with money? That’s what I thought. I mean “what the heck” it’s just a pile over there and as long as I have enough I’m okay, False.
How many times have you and your significant other fought over money? Recently, my sweetie came to me and said, “Why is this bill so high and why is it so confusing now… I never had these problems before!!!” and it wasn’t in a “joyous” tone, it was THAT “it’s all your fault” tone… ya’ know the one that leaps you into the defensive, Familiar? Well, now I’m feeling very small (child-like) and I am now “at the effect of” feeling judged and blamed, and I’ve taken on the story that “I am the problem” since he said everything was OK before, before what? before me? I’m feeling a strong parental presence here and it hurts so bad inside my chest cavity that instead of feeling miserable I just leave taking some of the story as my own (Yes, I took some bait and entered the drama). A few days go by while I’ve mentally checked out of the relationship to create my space to process what just happen. Did it have anything to do with that household bill? The answer is simple, No. It’s about money BUT it’s never about money!! I am excited to share my adventure here with you.
When you work on yourself, you will discover countless ah-ha moments that bring so much insight, growth and blow out what you thought was possible. This is my own experience and each of us has one to un-peel one layer at a time –
Contributing towards your retirement or savings accounts is a habitual practice, but how regularly are you make a deposit in your spiritual fund? How often do you pledge yourself to go inward, meditate, listen or pray? These are fundamental investments, ones that will continue to give back with undeniable returns over and over again!
How do I know my spiritual fund is running low…
Honestly, I have yet to achieve “daily” deposits, but have enough tools in my life that I can recognize or call out for support when needed. Today, I make weekly deposits, which is better than I could have ever imagined gifted myself! When we begin to changes it doesn’t happen overnight, but with small incremental commitments, one day it will just happen and become a ritual (habit). It will feel so natural that you’ll wonder why you didn’t start this years ago as you laugh out loud and love yourself! Making these weekly deposits will create a more positive, joyful and intuitive being. We all have loads of things to tend to in our busy lives, with our work, our bodies, our homes, our children, our relationships, and the list goes on. It’s easy to get overwhelmed and think that there isn’t enough time, but what I’ve found is that with some regularity, a little bit of time goes a long way.
I practice not by sitting in a corner with my thumbs together going “ohm” now, I’m not judging or saying that’s wrong, there is no wrong or right way to meditate, these are how I receive my spiritual funding. We all have our unique methodologies that work best for our individual bodies. I find a day in my garden, or long morning stretches or allowing myself a bit of extra time to just lay, even connecting each stretch with sound, but really allowing each part of my body to “at it’s own pace” awaken to the day! If the morning time must be on a strict time limitation, You may decide to incorporate a 15-min. practice at the end of your day as simple as “legs up the wall” until your body says “OK I’m done now”, trust me if you listen the body will reveal and usually a lot more than we expect! When the car runs out of gas, we fill it. When our relationship is mundane, we go on a date, so why not listen to our bodies and slow down to gently give the spiritual tank a refill? Make an agreement today to listen to your body and allow it’s voice to be heard is enough ? Another tool to consider is the “Insight Timer App” which is available on both iPhone and Android devices Insight Timer
“Leg’s up the Wall”
Nevertheless, maybe movement is not the meditation you’re ready for even tho’ I highly recommend movement, maybe you would like to create a spiritual log and journal just to get the information downloaded. Sometimes we cannot move without first dumping the stored data, then after the download of that which no longer serves us has been cleared, it can allow more space for maybe questions you want to explore and then await what answers may come when you allow yourself to write in a stream of consciousness!
Finally, I guarantee these fundamental practices are a pathway to vitality, more breath, more passion and connection with God, Universe and Spirit. You will notice incremental changes that lead to more creative flow and each day you do it, the power grows. I invite you to make more deposits into your own spiritual fund and drink from the well of your own practice to replenish the richness of your life!